The following will appear on your newsfeed today:

1. Baby, I love you so much, you’re my life!!! Kiss kiss, hug hug, penis tug #itsaforeverthing #reallove
2. Valentine’s Day is all a bunch of crap! It’s a commercial holiday made up by the greeting card industry! You should show your love 365 days a year, not just 1 day out of the year! It’s all a bunch of crap! #fuckValentine
3. I hate Valentine’s Day, my heart will forever be broken, woe is me. Fuck Valentine, fuck the entire world, fuck all happy couples and fuck you! #soalone #fml
4. My random posts about Valentine’s Day and whatever else comes to mind.#cuzimawesomelikethat

Those posting #1 are most likely chicks that’s are sharing their love for their boyfriends ALL over Facebook and they most likely do this at least 4 times a week. And it’s always REAL LOVE (despite the fact that 3 days later they will be posting about how much of an “asshole” he is).

Which brings me to the ones that post #2. These are the ones that go on and on about how “bad” and “commercial” Valentine’s Day is but in the mean time they are alone for Valentine’s Day, wishing that they had a date. But they will never admit to this, trust me that they won’t. Instead they act like they don’t care at all and they put up a front. #idontcareimbadass

Ah yes, #3! These are the ones that truly hate Valentine’s Day and are as single as you can possibly imagine. They don’t even have a Booty Call lined up. They will most likely be cranky as fuck all day long and hate on every and anyone that receives any present for Valentine. They will probably cry themselves to sleep tonight while listening to Bryan Adams sing ooey goooey love songs. Oh and if they’re female they will grab anything fatty in sight and eat it all up. And let’s face it: they’ll most likely be female.

Last but not least, you have #4, me! I will probably experience at least 6 different types of emotions before noon and I will most likely share pictures or videos that relate to how I feel or post status updates that might not make sense to the most of you and make you go: “What the fuck is wrong with this girl?!”… Then again, if you’re on my Facebook you probably have that “WTF?!” moment on a daily basis!

Happy Valentine’s Day!

#ohyesidid